17. Edamame Kit-KatMay 2, 2008
The Kit-Kat is so ubiquitous in Japan that even Rosemarie Fritzl would notice it cropping up now and then.
Little more than a plebian wafer combination in North American, the Kit-Kat of Japan is deified to the realm of demi-god or perhaps Buddha itself.
But of greater interest are the flavours that Japan has created to mask the faint cardboard aftertaste of the original variety.
- “vanilla” (which must contain something other than vanilla since the bar emerges in a pure white form)
- “banana” (sporting a pastel yellow look)
- “strawberry” (made with .048% real fruit)
- “sakura” (a seasonal shame)
- “apple” (fortified with vitamin C in case citizens begin to confuse confectionary with produce)
- “swirled melon” (from the swirled melon tree native to the Niger River)
- “blood orange” (no thank-you)
- “eraser” (the Kit-Kat design is imprinted on erasers throughout the nation. Unfortunately, erasers are non-caloric and cannot be further discussed).
- “matcha” (an abomination of culture)
- and finally, “edamame.”
Edamame is the greatest offender here (followed closely by the light green “apple”), not only to the Kit-Kat but also to Mother Nature. Legume should never be a flavour of chocolate, especially not edamame, a legume of otherwise great integrity.
For now, stick with the plain red and white label. Your won’t know what you’re missing, but then again, nor will Rosemarie Fritzl.