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9. No Time

April 17, 2008

North America already has cavity-fighting gum, but now Japan has gone a step further by advocating gum as a post-modern toothbrush.

And while everyone has made an occational oral faux pas (i.e. substituting toothpaste for carcinogenic breath strips or a discounted pear), No Time encourages this as a weekly regime: each pack contains seven “chunks.” Over time, once glistening enamel learns to hide its fuzzy face behind the sordid shield of gum.

The only way out is to realize that time is money

  • If you have time to earn the 100 yen that it costs for No Time, you have time to brush your teeth.

Tangentially…

  • If you have time to buy No Time, you have time to brush your teeth.
  • If you have time for an internal monolouge that leads to the conclusion that No Time is not oral rigamarole, you have time to brush your teeth.

*Hygiene is not a stick (or chunk) that you can chew*

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2 comments

  1. Your third line is erroneous… unless you mean ‘oral HYGIENE faux-pas’. That’s sloppy writing Chantal.

    P.S. I appreciate the irony of you posting an item called “No Time” on a blog that is a product of you having far too much time.


  2. That’s it Jason. You’re getting a post on unrefrigerated bakery shelf FISH onigiri.



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