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8. The Creamu Omelette

April 14, 2008

The Creamu Omelette, as it is aptly named, has recently made its debut in Japan – or at least in one place in Northern Japan.

The picture is self-explanatory: this is nothing more than an involute cast of egg swollen with falsely-coloured cream.

Apart from the obvious health effects of eating a purse of cream, one has to wonder how this is to be served – or when, if that.

Likely, there are three suggested servings

1. Hitori Dake style, where one ingests it solemnly, as if it were a foot-long sub, in a sunless corner of a moon-blanched room.

2. Cut into appropriate serving sizes. (Oh wait, cream cannot be cut)

3. By throwing it into the face of your greatest lactose-intolerant oppressor.

Clearly, this product is an abortion of practicality, if not taste. Worse is that it is sold in a 12″ box alongside other log cakes, as if it were meant for an office party or a candid birthday blow-out.

The beacon of hope here is that Japan has latched on to the omelette; now, it needs to go one step further and implement the greasy breakfast and/or post-bar brunch. Meanwhile, one must settle for this tumefaction- bedaubed with an army of dairy.

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2 comments

  1. I think if you’re going to be critiquing these things, you should be posting proof that you’re actually trying them! 😉

    I think from now on I will eat my meals in the sunless corner of a moon-blanched room… sounds much nicer than what I do now (enveloped in the warm glow of a CRT screen)


  2. Haha! Oh, I will. I’m not sure if my health insurance covers diabetes, so I had to pass on this one.



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